he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize