No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
