Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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