Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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