I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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