And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
You left your underwear on the fireplace
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
