Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
