Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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