If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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