Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
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