Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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