Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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