everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
