Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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