is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Help. Why am I so naked?
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