Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize