Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
