they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
