Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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