Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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