My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I just want nice things and good sex
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize