Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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