I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
he shaved USA in his pubs
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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