EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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