She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
