I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
