I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
