I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize