Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Less talking, more tequila
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize