Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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