I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
