Are we in a gay sports bar?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
zippers are such a cool invention
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
