bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Randomize
