I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
