when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
