so explain again why im purple
no
In America we eat man semen.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
