i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Who died my cat blue again?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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