So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
