Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Randomize
