Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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