For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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