Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
My feet surprised me
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize