I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
