I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
