At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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