Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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