Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Randomize
