after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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