Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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