yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
