i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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